3.18.2008

{ what I learn from YOU }


I am sharing with all of you some emails that I have received in the past week (with their permission of course) that have helped ME and I hope will help YOU as well. So thank all of YOU for sharing.

Living MY Values
...."I’ve learned these past couple of weeks that if I live my values, my life flows easily and when I don’t chaos and stress ensues. I’m back to health and fitness, family and THEN work….I’m making it happen with a plan…." - Jana
- This email from Jana reminded me of this very important concept...if we are truly living our values, our lives will flow smoothly and be aligned with the things that are most important to us. So take a few moments today to jot down your values and look to see if you are living them. If family is your #1 value but you are traveling all the time away from them for work, then perhaps you aren't really living that value. What can you do to change or adjust that. Thank you Jana.

Stepping Back & Reprioritizing MY Life...."Hello! I was thinking of you this morning because….Remember that list of books you posted a few weeks back? Well, I picked up Wonderful Ways to love a child. I love the quote inside by Jackie Onassis: “If you bungle raising your children, I don’t think whatever else you do matters very much.” Yes! I was thinking of that this morning as I’m in the process of reprioritizing my life, we only do what we make time for! I am inspired this weekend to get out my lobotome calendars and do just, make time for my children every single day. So, thank you my friend! And the story goes on, grin,… as I was leaving for work, I checked my e-mail and ran across the following article from MSNBC on Barack Obama’s mom…..it inspired me, and I thought I would pass it along to you as I know you are a supporter!" - J.W.
- This email reminded ME of how important it is when things get overwhelming to take a step back and ask myself, what am I doing?...what do I need to change in order for me to make time for what is most important to me? And to schedule TIME for those things each day whether it is exercising or fun time with the kids. J.W. - I'm glad your momME planner is helping.

Doing what I need to do and letting go of the guilt..."they are little things, but collectively they felt a little overwhelming--but have since found a place to work themselves out in the last few hours. so now, i'm taking a deep breath and hopefully cracking open a bottle of wine as soon as i get back from the grocery store. i did something i have never done before: ava woke up early from her nap this afternoon and i put her in front of sesame street. yikes. oh well." - M.M.
- This email reminded me how important wine is for sanity! :) But on a serious note, sometimes the BEST thing we can do for ourselves when things get overwhelming is to take a break - take a timeout. And if that means cracking open a bottle of heart healthy red wine or allowing your child to watch an educational television program for a little bit, then that is what YOU need to do. Without guilt...let the guilt go. M- I would say to you - I grew up watching seaseme street everyday and I turned out okay. So don't beat yourself up about it - instead congratulate yourself that Ava made it about 2 years further without tv then my daughter did! :)

Asking for HELP when I need it. "I am putting aside all sense of decorum, pride, and probably good taste by sending this email but sometimes it is necessary to simply ask for what we need. As some of you know I have been struggling with my health for the last year and a half. I was recently diagnosed with Lupus, finally putting an end to the mystery. I am working as a CNA and will not have health insurance for two more months. My medical bills and prescription costs, in addition to missed work time, have become financially overwhelming. I am sending this email to ask for your help...." - Kate
- Dear Kate, First of all I am so sorry about your diagnosis and I wish you much healing & strength. I know how hard it must have been for you to send that email out and ask for help. You are a strong, independent, wonderful woman and you did the RIGHT thing. Sometimes we all just need to ask for HELP. That is lesson #1 you bestowed upon me. #2 is that we NEED to help others who are in need - who are suffering or need a helping hand. And we all probably need to do this more than we already do. I will be sending you a check today. Take good care my friend and please don't hesitate to call if you need anything.

To all of my blog readers, a great quote to share...
"The majority of us lead quiet, unheralded lives as we pass through this world. There will most likely be no ticker-tape parades for us, no monuments created in our honor. But that does not lessen our possible impact, for there are scores of people waiting for someone just like us to come along; people who will appreciate our compassion, our unique talents. Someone who will live a happier life merely because we took the time to share what we had to give. Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have a potential to turn a life around. It's overwhelming to consider the continuous opportunities there are to make our love felt." - Leo Buscaglia

Stepping Back...This email came from my friend Julie...A great reminder that we need to instill our kids with the TOOLS to create a wonderful life but we can't do everything for them.
"When asked, "What's our job as a great parent or great teacher?" most people say something like, "To raise or help create really respectful and responsible kids." Our good friend and co-founder of Love and Logic, Foster W. Cline, M.D., disagrees. Dr. Cline argues:
It's not our job to raise responsible kids. Our job is to consistently do the things that give kids an opportunity to become responsible. When we spend all of our time and energy trying to make our kids respectful and responsible, we open ourselves up to major power-struggles. It's as if we send an unstated message such as, "All of my self-worth and happiness is tied up in how well you behave." This is far too much power for any child to have. Too often, strong-willed children use this power to punish their parents. In contrast, when we focus on doing the right things and giving our kids a great opportunity, we place appropriate responsibility on them and they have no battle to fight. The unstated message is much different: "While I want very much for you to have a happy and responsible life, I can't make that happen for you. You are the one who has to do most of the work."
- The messages in this... #1) Take care of yourself by remembering that the only thing you really have complete control over is yourself. #2) It is time to re-read my Love & Logic book again! Thanks Julie for passing this along!

3 comments:

Sarah said...

Hi J - Thanks for sharing these thoughts - all beautiful and so meaningful to me in many facets of my life. And I love that Leo B. quote - I just read it yesterday and it is so fitting for my life at the moment ...
xo sarah

debbiem said...

Love all of these everyday "lessons" - thanks for sharing Jen! I continue to learn so much from YOU!

carolyn said...

this was a wonderful post - thanks for sharing all of you emailers.

C